Peace of Mind… (blog)

With my final week before Step Off in front of me here is what’s happening for me:

Today, I was grateful that I have a coach. I was glad that we had an appointment – although before we started the call, I was sure I didn’t have time to spend 45 minutes coaching, let alone know what I wanted to coach about. Lo and behold, as we talked, there were plenty of things to discuss.

First, I’m feeling absolutely full of emotion and regularly finding myself needing to stop, take a breath and get back into my body.

Sometimes, I realize I’m speaking really quickly and there is a constriction in my throat that makes it hard to take a full breath. Sometimes, I’m full of sadness for what I am leaving behind. Sometimes, I get into a space in my head that tells me I’ll never get everything finished that I need to before I leave to go to California on Friday in anticipation of Monday’s Step Off.

STOP.

TAKE A BREATH.

GET BACK INTO MY BODY.

Here, I speak slowly, clearly and deliberately. Here, I am filled with peace – knowing that I am not leaving anything or anyone behind. Who I am today is a result of all the experiences as well as the people in my life. Here, I can thank my head for keeping track of the “to do” list, and feel in my heart how I need to be in the moment.

I have an amazing family – their support of me is unwavering.

I have incredible friends – they rally with me in every endeavor.

I have fantastic colleagues – they ask the hard questions AND… respect my choices.

I have faith – complete trust and confidence in the Walk for PEACE.

In just a fortnight, I Step Off on the Walk for PEACE.

A week ago Wednesday, Habitat for Humanity came for the second time… and picked up my furniture for donation. I was on my way to California at the time, but I learned from my brother-in-law that the folks who picked it up were grateful for the pieces, and indicated that they would not only be able to sell them, but that whoever purchased them would certainly enjoy them.

for the second time…

the first time, they wouldn’t take the furniture. They indicated the pieces needed to be moved out the sliding door in my living space, around the house and into the garage before they could take them. Thank goodness for my brother-in-law and a couple of strong, willing friends, we got the furniture moved.

When I was in California in January, a gentleman stopped his van next to mine (which was exactly like his), and asked me if I was interested in selling it. Mind you, I had no for sale sign on it, and I was busily working at cleaning out a storage shed I had been renting. He simply stopped and asked. I indicated that in fact I was, but not until late February. He asked me to keep in touch and let him know when I would be coming down – that he was really interested…

really interested…

resulted in us keeping in touch with one another via text message and phone between January and a week ago Friday. That morning, we met in the same place he originally stopped to ask if I wanted to sell the van, and we hugged as if we had been friends forever. After a quick check under the car and a test drive, I sold my van to this gentle hearted, funny, joyful man. What an amazing bit of synchronicity.

Last week, I had the opportunity to volunteer my time and energy to two different places, and to shift the focus to others. On Saturday, I spent the afternoon with several folks at Project Open Hand in San Francisco, CA – putting fresh spinach into small bags, sealing the bags, and placing them into crates to be put into the refrigerator. Next, we placed trail mix into small bags, and sealed them so to be ready for distribution. Then, on Monday, I headed to Sonoma, CA – to be an assistant for the first of four leadership retreats which will take place over the next 10 months. For the next 6 days, I had the great fortune to hold the space and bear witness to 23 beautiful, authentic people who have committed themselves to their leadership in the world…

leadership in the world…

I went through the leadership program I referenced above, and while the vision came to me some 20 years ago, I know that the program helped me tap into my inner strength and my desire to follow my calling to Walk for PEACE. There is a leader within each of us, and we each have the capacity to change our world as well as the world around us. One of the ways I find this to be true is by being of service to others. I have been very fortunate in my life, and for me, volunteering my time and energy is a way for me to give back.

Tonight, as I prepare for bed, I am aware of missing my little dog. She is staying with my dear friends in California while I complete the preparation for the Walk. While I would love to have her with me, the confusion and business causes her to be stressed – which she does not experience when she stays with her “other family”…

…other family

as I complete preparations for the Walk, I am acutely aware of my family and friends and their unwavering support of me, and I am grateful for my family of origin, as well as all the “other families” I have in my life. I am truly blessed.

In 4 weeks, I will Step Off on the Walk for PEACE.

As I prepare, I notice:

• I feel like I am watching a movie about the Walk, and at the same time, I’m playing the leading role.

• How lovely it is to own things and how much responsibility it is to own things.

• Although my dog can’t speak, she tells me every day how she feels.

• I’m curious and excited around the ever shortening number of days before Step Off, and I feel the sad about leaving the loving company of my sister and brother-in-law.

• I feel a sense of spaciousness as I let go of my possessions, and an awareness of needing every inch of space in the buggy that will hold our belongings (and sometimes Chandler) as I/we Walk.

And this afternoon, I had the opportunity to ride my motorcycle for almost an hour. As I rode, the challenges already faced faded out of sight and the mirage of challenges yet to come disappeared from the horizon.

I was present to chill of the fading winter air on my arms and the warmth of the coming spring sunshine on my back as the sun lowered slightly in the sky.

And I am reminded of what it is to be present to grace.

 

In 5 weeks, I will Step Off on the Walk for PEACE.

I want to take a moment to share some snippets of what it’s like to be preparing for this Walk.

A week ago, I took my motorcycle to be spruced up for sale. As I drove with it in the trailer behind me, I was aware of the feeling of freedom I felt when I used to ride. I remembered time I rode with my friend to a neighboring town where we laughed our way through lunch together before riding back home, and I could feel the warm, soothing sun on my back just as I did the day we took the trip.

In this moment, I feel the sun and hear the laughter of my friend.

A few days ago, as I washed the Italian pottery that belonged to my parents, I stood looking at the pattern and enjoying the intricate details in the design, and my heart filled with happiness. I thought about the people who painted the green rooster design on the pieces – and I felt happy about the very idea of a green rooster. I remembered the times my family used the pieces to hold the delicious food we prepared each year at holiday time, and I felt happy to think of all the people we had the chance to spend those moments with.

In this moment, I feel happy and sated.

As I pack away a few keepsakes, I take a moment to think of who gave them to me or where I got them and I feel lots of different emotions. You see, these things have traveled with me because they hold a special spot in my heart that is warmed when I hold them in my hand and look at them. The memories they evoke make me smile and cry. Knowing I will have a chance to hold them again, unwrapping each item and seeing it again for the first time makes me smile and breathe deeply as I place them gently in the box for safekeeping.

In this moment, I smile and cry.

People have lots of questions about the Walk. How will you stay safe? Where will you sleep? Do you have a first aid kit? What will you eat? How long will you walk? Will people walk with you? Is Chandler going with you? Are you going to have a phone?

As I am asked the questions, I answer to the best of my knowledge and ability. I don’t have all the answers, because I cannot see the future. And I haven’t done this before, so I have no memory to go on.

I’m up and down, happy and sad, excited and calm, confused and clearer than I’ve ever been…

For me, this is what presence is – this moment.

And… in this moment, I am at PEACE.

Hello people,

While I have had the good fortune to speak with some of you about my upcoming plans, I want you all to know…

…Some blogs suggest how long it will take to read them – I can’t really say that here, because I’m writing this for the first time. Suffice it to say, you might want to get a cup of coffee or tea or a nice glass of wine…

For about the past 20 years or so, I have had a vision (sometimes in a dream, other times while awake). That vision was, quite simply, of me walking. I couldn’t tell where I was, what I was wearing or even what I was walking toward. Each time I would see it (once or twice a year), the feeling I had was one of warmth emanating from inside out, coupled with an increase in my heart rate and a bit of anxiety. And each time, I passed it off by pushing the vision away. Until a little over two years ago, when the vision became more persistent – showing up more regularly and not going away even when I consciously tried to push it out.

I had not yet said anything to anyone about the vision.

So, I committed myself to taking two actions around it. First, I would ask Spirit to help me hold the space for it. And second, I would set pen to paper to find out what the vision was trying to say. At the top of the first page I wrote: “Please fill in the picture I am supposed to see.”

And off I went to begin redesigning what I ASSUMED was only my professional life through returning to coach training and oh, yeah, adding a leadership training program into the mix.

As I completed the core coaching curriculum and the first of the leadership retreats, I felt a deep stirring within around purpose and what it means to me. And I was inspired to set forth on a quest to participate in the Susan Komen breast cancer walk. What was so moving to me about this experience was not only the walk itself, but the awareness of the absolute commitment of one person (Nancy Brinker) to her purpose, and the sense of community it has evoked in people all around the globe.

In the meantime, I continued to write and pray for guidance around the vision, which I was beginning to understand as my purpose.

Still, I had not spoken of the vision to anyone.

In October, my sister and I were out for a walk, and I asked how it was that she came to being called to ministry. And as she began to tell me how the calling had occurred for her, I began to cry. And I couldn’t stop. Because you see, although the circumstances were different, she was telling me my story.

And the writing and praying continued – this time with a great deal of clarity.

And still, I said nothing.

About a month later, I sent an email to a friend of mine, asking if we could have dinner one night while she was in Washington. (She was coming to lead a class where I was assisting.) The night we had dinner together, I said out loud (for the first time), “I believe I am supposed to divest myself of my belongings and begin walking for peace.” My friend took a breath, looked into my eyes, and said, “Of course you are, and you’ll need a team to support you.” I asked if that meant she wasn’t going to try and talk me out of it, to which she replied, “Why would I?”

And when I spoke with my sister about it a few days later she said the tenderness with which I was holding this calling was akin to how she felt before entering the Seminary. She shared her support, concern and love with me. She asked me some hard questions. And she encouraged me to follow my heart.

And so it is – I am answering the call to Walk for PEACE.

What that looks like from the inside for me is about being presence wherever I go. It’s about a grass roots movement to bring people together in peace. It’s about rippling out goodness and peace rather than cynicism and hate. It’s about inviting 1conversation for peace into every interaction and then sharing that with others. It’s about giving and receiving, finding strength in vulnerability (both mine and that of others), trusting and instilling trust, inclusiveness and faith.

When I speak about the Walk, the feeling I have within is so deeply and profoundly humbling that it makes me cry.

I Step Off on March 21, 2016, in Nevada City, California. I will head toward San Francisco, arriving in time for the wedding of two dear friends, and staying for a couple of days. Then, I will commence walking again. And yes…Chandler (my dog) is coming with me.

During the Walk, I’ll either stay with people who offer me space in their homes, or along the route. I’ll have 1conversation for Peace with the people I meet along the way, inviting them to share with me how they find peace for themselves and how they can help ripple it out. And I’ll share my experience with them. If I can be of service either to people or in communities I visit, I will. I’ll speak when asked. I’ll give seminars on presence as a way to peace.

There is undoubtedly more to share, but this is it for now. If you want to share anything you’re feeling about the Walk with me, or the impact – I welcome any and all opportunity to be in conversation with you about it. Also, if you are interested in volunteering to support me on the Walk, please contact me for information on how you can help. Go to the contact page or reach me directly at aryonmelcher@gmail.com.

OR..

To donate funds directly, click here:

Fundraising Websites – Crowdrise

 

Peace…

Alexis

 

I lead with presence –

 

I lead with presence to fulfill myself and so you can live your greatest life.

In this way I am aware of the ability to be and do in unison. It’s about being fully available and totally ready for what is in the moment. Where did this gift come from? For as long as I can remember, I have been able to be with “crisis” situations. For example, many years ago, my sister and I were practicing at the local YMCA for a circus we were part of. I was on the opposite end of the gym when I heard a loud noise followed by a hush in the room. Before turning, I felt in my body that something had happened to my sister. And in fact, the equipment she was training on failed, and she fell from about 25 feet in the air to the floor, severely breaking her wrist. In that moment, my body actually changed. My heart rate slowed, my breathing slowed and my senses become more acute. My body became ready for the energy and calm that would be needed from me while I offered support to my sister. From that day to this, when I sense something “big” ahead, my breathing and my heart rate slow. I have the ability to see the many layers of what is happening and instinctively to sense what is needed, usually before it is generally known.

I can feel what others feel. It’s not that I sense or can relate – I can actually feel the sensations of other people and of animals. Over the years, I have learned to discern which energy/feelings/sensations belong to me and which belong to others, and that discernment enables me to be even more present with people. When I walk into a room, people know I’m there even when they don’t know exactly where. In the same way, my energetic field is available when I am not there. People have often told me that they think of me and draw on my strength for things they are going through. They know that if they come to me, I am able to be with them and with myself at the same time. It’s difficult to explain something that for me simply is.

Presence is a gift. I pay attention to myself and to what is flowing in me. I organize myself to be present but I can’t make it happen. I don’t try and accomplish presence. When I orient, presence flows through me. I’ve always described the feeling internally as my knowing. I am a vessel of service to the world around me. Because presence, which some people call grace, comes from a higher source, people are drawn to it.  There is movement and stillness, vibration and calm, resonance and dissonance in perfect harmony. It is from this place of presence that voice emanates. There is a rich yet vulnerable tone to my voice. The soulful resonance touches people.

I remember as a young person reading about Gandhi for the first time. I had a school assignment to write a biography, and Gandhi was one of the people we could choose to write about. I remember standing in the library, reading a section in the encyclopedia about Gandhi. There was a photograph of him in traditional Indian clothing, and words about his work in South Africa and India. As I read, I was aware of knowing what that clothing felt like to Gandhi’s skin. It was as if I were wearing the same clothes. I felt a pull in my chest and warmth came over me that came from deep within my body. I had the distinct feeling that I knew what Gandhi felt. I felt the depth of his yearning for peace as well as the profound knowing that he was called to be an agent for change.  And…that I knew what his feet felt like as he walked. I knew the temperature of the land upon which he walked and the connection of the soles of his feet to the earth. How do you tell someone when you’re 12 or 13 that you know this? You don’t. I didn’t. I simply continued to be aware of things. And I have given of myself freely, because I feel called to do so.

I believe that this energy is the reason people respond to me with comments like:  “You’re easy to talk to.”  “I feel safe with you.”  “I feel like I can tell you anything.”  “I never feel judged by you.”  “I feel seen by you.”  “It’s as if you understand me better than I understand myself.”  “I want more time with you.” “I feel good when I’m around you.” “You are so wise.” “You inspire me.” “When I’m around you, I feel like everything is okay and is going to be okay.” There is a vibration that emanates from me that is alluring to people.

I meet people at their soul. By being present, I invite people to be authentic. When people are engaged with me, they want more from me and they want more from themselves. I can feel this. When I am at my most vulnerable, I am also in my greatest strength. When we are vulnerable, our defenses lessen and we are more open to one another. It’s like music – it reaches past our defenses, into our souls and moves us. In this place of knowing, there is no limit to what is available. This is why people come back to me. They feel the possibility and they sense that it is available to them. There is a steadfastness that transcends words. There is a mystical quality to their experiences with me. And there is a sense that no matter what, they are safe to be whoever they are, say whatever they need to say, knowing that the next time we meet, they will be welcome.